Not long after posting last week’s blog entry, a coworker of mine literally sneezed all over me. It was like one of those stupid comedy movies or cartoon shows, there was so much mucous. I would have laughed at the result, but those situations in real-world settings are five kinds of nasty. Long story short, I caught, and still have, his cold. This has put me in a precocious situation, because I have a date with a fit tease coming up. I met her on a fitness dating site the weekend prior to what we’ll call “Sneezegate.” We’ll call it that because it was exactly like Watergate, only with less politics and a lot more yuck.
I tried resting up as much as humanly possible and even took a day off work in order to beat this bug, but so far, things aren’t looking all that great. It’s kind of ironic, because my date read that post I made a few months ago that stated how my physique was starting to look pretty sweet. So here she is, expecting me to be in even better shape than then, and I’m going to show up wheezing just from the walk over there. Sounds sexy, right?
I thought about rescheduling our date or even cancelling it altogether, but this is one fit beauty I just can’t risk slipping through my fingers. She’s not just in shape, but also she’s a fit tease! When I sent her a pic of what my abs look like now (they’re starting to cube! Finally!), she thanked me by sending me a topless pic of herself! Of course, she coyly covered up her naughty bits with her arm, but that just turned me onto her even more so!
Tentatively, I sent her a private message that suggested we do something classic for a first date instead of something exercise-related. Knowing that this would make me seem like a non-athlete (which you don’t want to come across as when on a fitness dating site), I explained that I was feeling a bit “under the weather.” She got the hint and then demonstrated how she’s also the other kind of fit tease by suggesting we sweat my cold away. At first I thought she was referring to something naughty, but then added that a good 2k run is perfect for exercising away one’s illnesses.
Being a total fit tease, I think she actually meant what she said to be taken as a double-entendre. However, I did promise to get her heart rate up (teasingly implying sex), so she’s going to call me on that and expect me to do something exercise-themed, anyway. Ugh! Why do I fall for the playful types all the time? This is going to be one painfully fun first date!